Thursday, October 16, 2014

waiting for morning

Oh, I am struggling! This week has been "bear down" hard on my heart and mind as I have been working with the issues that are so central to our lives here in these days. I have been in tears quite a bit and angry at times, weary and quite nauseous at my inability to figure out how to walk like Christ in this time. Taking the words from one of my favorite songs, I have been asking the Father, "How do I love the captive soul and rage against the captor?" What does that look like in my life? How does it play out in my every days? How can I be Your hands, feet, heart, and mind?

Last night as I went to bed heartsick again, I prayed that I would be able to fall asleep quickly and that, truly, today would bring a whisper of an answer. God honored my request. I am so grateful for His blessings.

First of all, I woke feeling well. Stress had manifested in several physical symptoms this week, and I find them gone today. Also, there is peace - inexplicably - there is peace. And encouragement! There is gentle joy in this day - being here, doing what I do - without the feeling of oppression by what has been bearing on my mind.

The whispered promise that is the key: hope. Hope!

Not in what I could ever do or say or be, but hope in who He is, what He has already said, and all that He can do. Hope! Be watchful, guard my heart, love others, trust Him and hope. He will have His way - and nothing, nothing can change that.

Added to all of this, I popped in to the book of face for a minute, and my precious Sarah had posted this: "May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him" from Romans 15:13.

And so... “I wait for the LORD, my soul waits, and in his word I put my hope. My soul waits for the Lord more than watchmen wait for the morning, more than watchmen wait for the morning.” ♥

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